


House Party

by Afalstein



Series: Recruitment Drive [12]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Castle, Much Ado About Nothing (2012), Person of Interest (TV)
Genre: Complete, Crossover, Crossover Pairings, F/M, Humor, Multiple Crossovers, Recruitment, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-06
Updated: 2016-05-19
Packaged: 2018-04-19 07:34:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4737965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Afalstein/pseuds/Afalstein
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Director Coulson gets called back to the Malta safehouse by Agent Jillian.  Don Pedro is back from the wars, and a welcoming party is just the thing to cement SHIELD's cover in the area.  Unfortunately, Agent Root invites herself along.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Plans

“Morning, Director Coulson.”   Koenig and Skye both beamed at their superior as he came into the command room.

“Billy. Skye.”  Coulson smiled.  “Give me the updates.”

Shining with pride, Koenig produced a tablet from behind his back and gave a little cough, reading.  “The Roxxon corporation began construction on the Genosian oil platform.  Images from spy satellite suggest that they’re building more than the plans implied. The French prime minister was kidnapped, by unaligned activists, according to our best guess.  There was a drone strike in Azerbijan, which we’ve managed to connect to McQuaid Securities, but we’re still waiting on its significance.  Agent Akadour is on the ground investigating who exactly was shot.”

            “Good.”  Coulson nodded.  “What else?”

            Koenig scrolled down a bit more.  “Let’s see... One of our satellites is getting a funny reading from North Korea... we have analysts looking into it.  The Deputy Commissioner of the CIA sprung a hooker from jail last night.”

            “Carter and Walker both vouched for the DCS.”  Coulson frowned.  “What do we know about the hooker?”

            “Tech department has the report on that.”  Koenig nodded at Skye, who handed him a folder.  “Body found burnt from the inside out was found in Massachusetts.  An Indonesian district in the mountains suddenly went completely dark. Doctors have identified strains of a new form of malaria in Ecuador.”

            “What do we know about the Indonesian district?”  Coulson frowned.

            “Low tech level, but populous enough they should still be appearing on the internet.”  Koenig shrugged.

            “Send Mills and Shaw to look it over.  What else?”

            “Our New York cell contacted us about rumors of a human arachnid.  Drug lord Antony ‘Mad Dog’ Mendez was found dead in his tub; reprisals are expected.  The US president left for his scheduled meeting in Israel.  And... some campers spotted Wendigo in the Canadian Rockies.”  Koenig folded up the tablet.  “That’s all.”

            Coulson nodded.  “Skye.”  He said, turning.  “Tech Division updates?”

            “Nothing too interesting.”  Skye shrugged.  “Decima seems to be still in a holding pattern.  Our best guess is that they’re still calculating a proactive response to our hacking attempts. Incidentally, we think Stark’s got people on it too—he might be a bit too curious about their Samaritan program.”

            “That’s Stark in a nutshell.”  Coulson gave a weary nod.  “Too curious for his own good.”

Skye gave a reluctant nod.  “The Sicilian National Reserve was hacked last night. We’re tracing the hacker, they may have Maggia connections. Also:”  Skye’s voice took on a new tone. “Interesting piece of intel in that Hydra base we raided last week—the location of a Washington DC facility.  A bank.  It might be connected to the Winter Soldier.”

Coulson raised his eyebrows.  “Get a team together—you, Tripp, and Jenna at least.  Go and look into it.”

“Sir.”  Skye grinned, and made for the exit.

“Last item.”  Coulson turned back to Koenig.  “The Special Investigation Division?”

Koenig handed him a sheaf of papers.  “Agent Murphy’s report.”  He answered. “And I checked.  Still no info on Steven Strange OR Ivy.”

“Of course.”  Coulson sighed.  “A man can hope.  Ah well.  That’s it, then?”

“That’s it!”  Koenig beamed, turning his tablet over.  “Oh wait.”  He blinked at the post-it note on the back.  “Agent Jillian called.”

“From the Malta safehouse?”  Coulson frowned, twisting his head to look at the note.  “What about?”

Koenig looked up at his boss.  “A reminder that you have a house party in two weeks.”

* * *

 

            “So, Dom Pedro’s back from the wars, hm?”  Coulson was in the kitchen, picking chips out of a bowl.  “Guess things must have gone well with the pirates.”

            “Intelligence reports suggest so, yes, sir.”  Agent Jillian, a tall, slim woman with long dark hair, swatted his hand away from the bowl.  “Apparently they found a small dive port town the pirates had been operating out of and managed to close it off.”  She smiled.  “It was quite a battle, according to the townspeople.”

            “I’ll have Koenig send me further details.”  Coulson tapped a button on his phone.  “We need to stay up to date on the local security.”

            “Of course, sir.”

            “So...”  Coulson looked at Jillian with a slightly confused expression.  “...a house party?”

            Jillian gave just a slight pause as she turned towards the cupboards.  “...yes, sir.  They’ve just recently come back, they’re looking for a chance to re-integrate, I thought a houseparty would be a way to improve connections with the royal family and also perhaps get a first-hand account of the situation with the pirates.”

            “Good thinking.”  Coulson nodded, watching the girl as she took out a long knife.  “Is... ah... Ensign Claudio included in the invitation?”

            Jillian froze, hand poised just above the knife drawer.

            Coulson grinned at the way the blush was spreading up her cheeks.  “Aaaaaah.  So... about these... ‘connections’ you were planning to make with the royal family...”

            “Still a valid purpose!”  Jillian protested, raising her hands.  “It’s a perfect chance to further cement friendship with Don Pedro! Claudio might not even come, and... and he’s probably forgotten all about me.  And...”  She blushed again.  “...and... well, he might make a valuable asset if... if...”

            “You’re not inviting Claudio because he’s an asset.”  Coulson wagged his finger at the junior agent.  “And I forbid you from seducing him solely for the sake of the Agency.  If you must do it, do it for fun.”

            Again Jillian’s face was red.  “But sir...”

            “I refuse to use my agents as pawns to be traded off.”  Coulson answered sharply.  “Anyway, a relationship started on that is just a timebomb waiting to go off.  Would probably leave our relationship with the prince in worse shape than we started.”  Again he wagged his finger.  “I order you to have fun with it.  Got that?”

            “Yes... sir.”  Agent Jillian’s face was VERY red.

* * *

 

“Ah!”  Coulson came out of the front doors to welcome the car as it sped up the drive.  “So good to see you, Agent Groves!”

            “Coulson, you’re not making this easy for me.”  Root said in a low voice.  It was a calm tone, but if you knew Root, it was also recognizable as a frigidly angry tone.  “Do you have any idea what sort of work I’m doing?  How important it is?”

“One, no.  You never call us with updates, you never respond to queries, we can barely track you with the GPS in your eyeball.”  Coulson answered.  “Two, even if I did, I’m not sure it would make much difference, because you only listen to the Machine anyway.  And three...”  Here a puzzled expression grew on Coulson’s face.  “...I don’t recall ordering you back to Malta.  It’s a simple house party, I doubt we’ll need you.”

            “It’s a house party with that _disgusting_ Prince Pedro and his _loathsome_ second Benedick and his _absolutely detestable_ other second Claudio.”  Root practically hissed, pushing past Coulson.  “That idiotic man-child is going to be all over Jillian the moment he gets here.” 

            Coulson turned.  “Have I mentioned I really love this big-sister complex you’ve got going?”  He smiled.

            “Please.”  Root snorted, continuing up the drive.  “I’m worried about her compromising our cover here.”

            “Jillian?  Not likely.”  Coulson shook his head.  “Girl’s as loyal as they come.  Personally, I’d think you’d be excited about the chance to infiltrate the prince’s inner cabinet.  You know... cement our position here, influence the government, get early warning of anything... stuff like that.”

            Root turned to look at Coulson.  “Hm.  That seems a little cold for you, director.”

            “For me, yeah.”  Coulson gave a half-chuckle, half-grimace.  “I said I thought _you’d_ be excited.  I’m about to throw up.”  He looked around for a moment and then took a step closer.  “Do you... think this is the right thing to do, Root?”

            “You’re asking _me_ about the right thing to do.”  Root studied him doubtfully.

            Coulson blinked.  "Right.  Sorry.  Didn't think that one through."

            Root continued up the drive.  “For what it’s worth, the Machine thinks it’s the _smart_ thing to do.”

“That’s something, I guess.”  Coulson shrugged.  “It just rubs me the wrong way.  It feels like I’m using people.”

            “You’re a leader.  Using people is what you do.”

            “You have a disturbing definition of leadership.”  Coulson frowned.  “And people.  And what we do.  Actually, most of your definitions are pretty disturbing.”

            Root just gave a long, silky smile.  “Well, by any of them, this idea is perfectly fine.” The smile disappeared.  “Just not with Jillian.” 

            By contrast, Coulson’s smile sprang into life.  “Thanks,” he chuckled, throwing an arm over her shoulders.  “Because Jillian is the one part of this idea that I like.”


	2. Behind the Scenes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The prince and his retinue arrive, and Coulson, Root and Castle set about making them safe and comfortable.

‘Root.”  Coulson said, looking over the tablet.  “Did you place Benedick and Claudio in the fake baby’s room?”

            “The what?”  Jillian glanced up.

            “That pink room upstairs with the dollhouse and all the stuffed animals, the one that’s supposed to be your old room.”  Coulson answered.

            “Oh right.”  Jillian nodded.  Then her eyes widened.  “Wait, you put the guys in _there?_ ”

            “I did.”  Root’s smile was positively malicious.  “Why?  Is there a problem?”

            “Ohmigod Samantha, what is the MATTER with you!?”  Jillian raised her hands to her head.  “You put Claudio in... Oh my word.  He’s going to hate me now.”

            “Probably.  He’s shallow like that.”  Root smirked.

            Coulson turned to look at her.  “Exactly why do you dislike Claudio and Benedick so much?”

            “Odd name, Bene-dick.”  Root considered.  “Why not Benedict?  Why change it deliberately to that, of all things?”

            “I... I need to fix this.”  Jillian fled out the door.

            “His parents must have been so cruel.”  Root was still thinking.  “Or perceptive.”

            “Root.”  Coulson closed his eyes.

            Rolling her eyes, Root turned away.  “Why do I need a reason to hate someone, Coulson?”

            “It would make me feel better.”  Coulson pointed out.  “I understand that you hate all people generally, but I’d like to think there’s some reason why you’ve chosen to detest Claudio and Benedick so specifically.”

            Root sighed.  “I would too.”  She admitted, looking away.  “But I don’t have one.”

            Coulson blinked.  “What?”

            “I don’t have a specific reason.”  Root repeated, with a particular edge to her voice.  “I can’t put a finger on why I hate the sight of them, I just...”  She gave a little grunt of frustration.  “They just....”  She finally said.  “They just seem so _wrong_.  Especially Claudio.”

            “Really?”  Now Coulson looked thoughtful.  “I would have thought you had it out for Benedick, more.”

            Root’s bitter face collapsed into annoyance.  “Benedick’s a pig, but he’s not stupid.” She turned away and barely muttered.   “And... not bad for a quick fling...”

            Coulson glanced at her sharply.  “What?”

            “He doesn’t quite... unsettle me the way Claudio does.”  Root said.  “But  both of them just... rub me the wrong way.  More with Claudio, but Benedick too.  And the Prince, while we’re at it, but I understand the need for schmozing up to him.”

            “Leaving aside that the Prince is also something of a friend,” Coulson said, “it’s just as important to remain on good terms with his retinue.  Can you at least be professional about this while you’re here?”

            Root rolled her eyes.  “If you insist.”

* * *

 

            “I planted bugs in all the rooms, so that we can ensure 24-hour surveillence at all times. 500 cameras.”  Agent Castle motioned to the chart laid out on the table. 

            “We have, like, two monitors.”  Agent Don pointed out.

“Working that out.”  Castle waved.  “Koenig gave our computers here some sort of face-identification threat-identifier software, should allow the computers to do most of the watching.  Just present us with the most relevant data.”

“Is that why they’ve been booting up for the last two hours?”

“I’ve put in a requisition order for some more advanced hardware.  Now.”  Agent Castle tapped the chart again.  “I’ve identified fifty possible avenues of attack, including air, ground, and bestial.”

“Bestial?”

“Rabid rats, discreetly introduced into the garden.”  Castle spread his hands.  “Unnoticed, but when guest come wandering through, POW!”  Again he gestured to the chart.  “I suggest that we deploy our two security guards in the following patrol route...”

“Rick, don’t you think you’re taking this a BIT too seriously?”  Don raised an eyebrow.  “The prince has his own security and Koenig is running the real security network from the bunker.”

            “I’m BORED, Don.”  Castle pleaded, rounding on his partner.  “Can you please let me have this?   Kate is all over the world, playing super-international spy-hunter, while me...”  He looked glumly at the chart, “...I’m stuck at home playing washed-up-cop-come-security-guard.”

            Agent Don looked at his partner.  “You’re COMPLAINING about a cushy job guarding a Mediterranean villa.”

            Castle sighed.   “I heard ‘working at an espionage hub’ and I expected it to be fighting off ninjas every five seconds.  At least I thought it would involve more ‘saving the world’ type jazz...”

            A beep from the computers alerted both men that the grey desktops had finally finished booting up.  “You get to consult on investigations, don’t you?”  Don pointed out.

            “Spywork via Skype.”  Castle grunted, making his way over to the monitors.  “Yay.”

            Don followed him.  “I’m sure they’ll get someone else to handle security here soon, and you’ll be back kicking ass alongside your wife.”  He assured his partner, as the larger man began clicking through the different surveillence feeds.

            “Easy to say, but it’s been...”  Castle paused suddenly.  “That guy,” he said, pointing at a monitor.  “What’d he just say about marrying Hero?”

* * *

 

            “He’s going to ask you to marry him.  Tonight.  Probably at the masquerade.”

            Agent Jillian Rivers, aka “Hero,” frowned at the departing security personnel.  “Does agent Castle seem just a little bit _too_ into his role as chief of security?”

            “Did you hear me?”  Root hissed.  “The bugs we left in the room picked up on that loathsome oaf talking it over with that boorish prince of his.  The prince is going to pretend to be Claudio at the masked ball, and court you in his place.  It’s positively sickening!”

            “It is not!”  Jillian looked up at the older woman with sudden sharpness.  “I think it’s kind of sweet.  Claudio can barely manage three words around me, he’d never be able to muster up a proposal.  The prince helping him out is very noble.”

            “Sweetie...”  Root gave Jillian a patronizing look.  “That adorable ‘silent shy’ thing is just a ploy.  Men use it all the time.”

            “Well, apparently he’s not using it now.”  Jillian rolled her eyes.

            Coulson came rushing down the stairs.  “Agent Castle just told me.”

            “Does he seem a bit too deep in his role to you?”  Jillian asked.

            Taken off guard, Coulson blinked, “Maybe?  He was asking for some sort of laser-rat-hunting drone to be put in the...”  He shook his head.  “Look, are you sure you want to do this?”

            “Sir, we’ve discussed the political implications...”

            “We discussed that they shouldn’t be discussed.”  Coulson cut her off.  “Look, I’ll be the first to say that Claudio’s all right...”

            “ _I_ won’t.”  Root added.

            “...and brave, and capable enough, and certainly crazy about you, but...”  Coulson sighed as he looked at her.  “...I don’t know.  It seems like you could do better.”

            “Better than the second of a Mediterranean prince?”  Jillian gave a little laugh.  “I don’t fancy myself THAT much, sir.”

            “Better as a _person_.”  Coulson specified.  “I always... I don’t know, I always thought you’d end up marrying some young dashing SHIELD agent or settle down in retirement with some nice provincial boy.”

            Jillian gave a fond smile.  “Thanks dad.”  She said, patting Coulson’s arm.  “I appreciate that.  But...”  She bowed her head and looked up at the director shyly.  “...I don’t want to do ‘better’ than Claudio.”

            Coulson looked at her for a second and sighed.  “Very well.  It’s your call, but if you want it...” In a moment of impulsiveness, he kissed the top of her head.  “...I won’t stand in the way.”


	3. Chapter 3

“Then he has your permission?”

            “Yes... sorry, I’m still trying to work out why, exactly, you needed to pose as Claudio and spend the whole evening murmuring sweet nothings into my daughter’s ear.”  Coulson squinted at the Prince doubtfully.

            Jillian, just behind the prince, gave a tiny roll of her eyes.

            “Because it was hilarious!”  The prince insisted.  “And also...”  He looked a bit shamefaced, “...well, Claudio's great and all, but the man couldn't romance his way into a barn."

Jillian giggled a little.

            "That's... good, probably."  Coulson considered.  “Certainly if you have no objection, and Hero has no objection...”  Jillian blushed and shook her head, “...I don’t see why I should have any objection to it.”

            “Ha!  There’s a man.”  The prince clapped Coulson on the shoulder.  “Benedick’s out looking for Claudio now, we’ll tell him the good news together as soon as he comes back.”

            “Who comes back?”  Root came in the door, carrying a variety of glasses, left around the lawn from the evening party.

            “Have you seen Claudio?”  Prince Pedro asked her.

            “No.”  there was just the faintest curl of her lip.

            “Well, if you do, call him in.  We have some happy news.”

            Root shook her head, but stacked the glasses on the counter and went off into the living room.

            “So much for Claudio.”  The prince sighed, dropping onto a handy stool.  “Now all we need is a woman for Benedick.”

            “Good luck with that.”  Coulson said, picking up the cups and starting to put them away.  "That guy's got some serious issues."

"Tell me something I don't know."  The prince shrugged.  "There's got to be a story there, but he's never shared what women have ever done to make him hate them like that."

"He doesn't hate them." Jillian spoke up.  "He's afraid of them."

Coulson and the prince looked at her, but she just smiled and shook her head.  “What about you, your highness?”  Jillian asked, picking up a glass of water.  “Don't you want to get married?”

            “Me?”  The prince laughed.  “What for?  The world is too full of beautiful women to limit myself to one.”

            “B-but devoting yourself to one can be so rewarding!” Jillian insisted, pushing past her embarrassment.  “You learn each other’s foibles, habits, vulnerabilities...  You can’t just have sex with strangers all the time.”

            “Of course not! I have a foxy lady back at the palace who I see regularly.”  

            “A-a...”  Jillian turned bright red.

            “I... don’t think that’s what my niece meant.”  Coulson gave a bemused smile.  “I think she was going along the lines of stability more than familiarity."

            “Eh.”  The prince clearly was not interested in discussing the subject.  He picked up a guitar sitting next to the stool.  “Is this yours, Leonato?”

            “Er...”  Coulson froze.  The guitar belonged to Agent Poole, who had been  down last week for a work holiday.  “My... late wife’s.”  He managed, with only a slight pause.

            The prince took the pause for grief.  “Oh.”  He said, setting it back down.  “I’m sorry.”

            “Do you play?”  Coulson said.  “No, no, pick it back up!  I didn’t mean to... it’s been a while since I’ve heard it used.  It’ll be good to hear it again.”

            The prince took little persuading.  “Well...”  he raised it and laid it across his knees, giving it a quick strum.  “Ooh!  Still in tune! What're the odds?"

            “I... pick it up from time to time.”  Jillian quickly covered.  “Sorry, dad.  It... reminds me of mom, sometimes.”

            “That’s alright, honey.”  Coulson smiled at his ‘daughter.’ 

            She was good.  Very good.  It was almost a pity, she could have been quite an espionage asset.  (In a way, Coulson supposed she still would be, but he didn’t like thinking of the marriage like that).  Yet Coulson thought about Audrey, and he couldn’t regret giving this young woman a chance at life outside the game.

The prince began to pick out a tune.  Coulson wasn't a musician, but he'd been to a few concerts in his time.  "You're pretty good at that, your highness."  He observed.

"I am," said the prince, with a cocksure grin, "a man of many talents."

Coulson could agree with that.  The nation's state testified to the man's effectiveness as an administrator, and their intel had verified his military exploits.  They had also documented instances of medical knowledge and skill with multiple vehicles.  Coulson found it hard to reconcile with the lackadasial playboy he found himself entertaining so often.

He also wondered why, given the prince's lazy manner, he found himself liking the man so much.

* * *

"You think she bought it?"

"I know she did!"  Jillian insisted.  The junior agent was practically dancing with glee.  "If you could've seen her face..."  she let out a little squeal.  "She's in there now, looking up reports of Benedick's exploits against the pirates!  All she needs is a single erotic fan novel, and she'll be all set!"

"It's about the same with him."  Coulson rubbed his forehead.  "I passed him five minutes ago, and he was trying to hide this portrait of Root behind his back."

"Isn't it wonderful!?"  Jillian nearly squealed again.

"This is horrifying!"  Coulson insisted.  "Root?  In love?  With Benedick?  I thought the prince was crazy even to suggest it, but now..."  He shook his head. "I... I guess they must've had something already..."

"She and Benedick had a fling last year."  Jillian said.  At Coulson's look, she quailed a little.  "Root told me not to tell anyone!  It didn't seem really important at the time!  But you could tell... from the way she talked about it..."

Coulson just gave a snort and shook his head again.  "Guess it's true what they say about opposites."  He said.  "I suppose I should have guessed, from how they were always ragging on each other."

"I swear.  It's like the plot to half the dimestore romance novels I read back in high school."  Jillian giggled.

"Wonder why the Machine hasn't told her about the ruse."  Coulson said.

Jillian shrugged.  "Maybe she hasn't asked it.  Maybe it's 'not relevant.'"

"Maybe the Machine thinks it'll be good for her."  Coulson mused.

 "You think..."  Jillian sobered a little, "...this might... I mean, you think she'd be happy?" 

"I think it might make her... a little less Root-ish."  Coulson conceded.

Jillian's eyes shone.  "Wouldn't that be something?"  She beamed.  "I marry Claudio, and Root marries Benedick?  We'd practically be sisters!"  She did her little dance again.  "Oh, this wedding is going to be WONDERFUL!"

* * *

 

 

            The wedding was a disaster.

            “I’m going to kill him.”  Root hissed, her hands shaking.

            “Root!”  Coulson followed the furious woman into the house.  Root talked about killing so lightly, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t serious.  “Stop a moment!  Just stop!”

            “I told you Claudio was a snake.”  She said, whirling on him.  “I told you he was an idiot.  He goes and pulls a stunt like this...”

            “Look, I agree, he’s an idiot, okay?”  Coulson raised his hands.  “To even think Jillian would...”  Words failed him and he closed his eyes.  “My point...”  he said slowly, “...is that there’s something else going on.  Caudio’s not smart enough to think of this himself.  Benedick’s right, we need to focus on Duke John.”

            “I don’t care.”  Root ‘s hands were making clenching and unclenching motions.  “Idiocy is the next closest thing to malice.  If he had a problem, he should have taken it to her before...”  Overcome, she let loose a primal screech and batted the air furiously.  “He waits until the wedding to accuse her of cheating on him?”  She demanded.  “In front of everyone?  Seriously?”

            Coulson’s own mouth was a thin line, and his brow was furiously furrowed.  “We need to wait.”  He managed to say.  “The plan... it’s a good one.  If they think she’s dead...”

            “I’m going to kill him.”  Root said, turning away.

            “Just wait!”  Coulson grabbed her arm.  “Ask... ask your  machine.”  He managed, desperately.  “Ask her what you should do.  She’ll tell you.”

            Root stilled, her eyes flitting back and forth.

            Coulson saw his chance.  “If you kill the prince’s second, however deviously...”  Coulson was disturbingly certain Root could kill a man and leave no evidence, “...they’ll guess what happened.  It’ll cause an international incident.  We’ll lose one of our primary safehouses in the region and it’ll severely affect operational efficiency.” 

None of these considerations had the slightest effect on Coulson’s opinion, nor, he imagined, on Root’s.  But they would impact the Machine’s opinion, and Root took the Machine’s opinion VERY seriously.

“...very well.”  Root was still shaking, and her face was furious, but her voice was calm. 

Coulson sighed with relief.  “Okay.”  He said.  “I’m off to set up the cover—calls to doctors, medications, things like that.  We can stick Jillian in the safe room until we’ve had a chance to see how the prince and Claudio react to her ‘dying.’”

“Fine.” 

Coulson paused at the door.  “Just... so we’re on the same page.”  He said.  “You’re not planning to kill Claudio anymore?”

Root gave a smile and held up a finger.  “Pinkie Promise.”

Coulson’s brow furrowed.  “Somehow, that’s LESS reassuring.”

Rolling her eyes, Root dropped her hand.  “I promise I won’t kill Claudio.  Happy?”

Coulson looked troubled, but he left.

Root glanced at the window.  “...I’ll just get Benedick to do it for me.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In the play, the other characters conspire to bring Benedick and Beatrice (Root) together, mostly for the challenge of the thing. They do this by pretending to be talking about (in the hearing of each) how the other person was talking so much about how they loved them. It works surprisingly well. Joss's adaptation partly explains this by inserting a previous fling between the two, which left them with some lingering feelings that they each sort of ran from.
> 
> Things go badly when Claudio, deceived by the Prince's brother John, accuses Hero (Jillian) of cheating on him. He does this at the wedding itself, in full public view. Beatrice, enraged by Claudio's treatment of her cousin, tells Benedick, who is comforting her, to prove his love for her by killing Claudio...


	4. Final Words

“We need to work on our communication.”  Coulson groaned, kneading his forehead.

            “I tried to tell you.”  Castle said, standing in front of his superior.  “We caught Prince John’s goons the night before the wedding.  If you’d come and interrogated them directly...”

            “You were speaking gibberish!”  Coulson raised his eyes to glare at his subordinate.  “Like you were drunk!  Why couldn’t you just say, ‘Hey, we caught two shady characters who were going on about how they framed Jillian for infidelity?’”

            “I was in character.”  Castle stated impressively.  “I was trying to be discreet.  That’s what we do, right?  As spies?”

            Coulson groaned again and pinched his nose.  “Communication.”  He repeated.

* * *

 

            The Mediterranean night was warm, and the sky was clear, allowing the moon to shine down and cast its silvery light over the parade of candle-bearing mourners.

            It also illuminated the two women watching silently from the hill high above.

            “Does everyone want to attend their own funeral?”  Jillian asked, at length.  “I feel like that’s a universal fantasy.”

            “Not really.”  Root answered.  “But I’ve been told I’m an outlier in a lot of ways.”

            Jillian shrugged, still watching the mourners.  “I guess it’s not a funeral, per se.  But it’s close.  Plus, a candle-light vigil is… kinda romantic.”

            Root looked at her.  “You’re not seriously still in love with that idiot.”

            “Claudio’s not an idiot.”  Jillian answered, watching the man at the head of the line.  “I know he comes off like that, but he’s really quite smart.  Just… a little too trusting.”

            “Of the wrong people.”  Root said bitterly.

            Jillian didn’t answer right away.  Root looked at her and saw the pained lines on her face.

            Root hesitated.  A flicker of compassion crossed her face.  “I didn’t...”  She started.

            “I’m fine.”  Jillian said.  “But you’re… right.  It… He… so quickly… just took Prince John’s word… and he didn’t even let me...”  A sudden hitch cut off her voice and after a while she concluded.  “...but look at him.”  She shook her head, still looking at the man.  “He’s... in so much pain.  I can’t leave him like that.”

            “I could.”  Root’s eyes gleamed.  “I could put a bullet into his head from here and not feel the slightest difference.”

            “You really shouldn’t say things like that all the time.”

            “It’s true.”  Root said.  “Everyone down there is probably night-blind from looking at the candles, they wouldn’t be able to make us out.”

            “I don’t care if it’s true, you still shouldn’t say it.”  Jillian flashed her a look.  “No one’s shooting anybody, so talking about it is pointless.”  She folded her arms.  “Besides, we’re silhouetted against the sky here; we’d be totally obvious.”

            Root grunted and crossed her arms.  “I suppose the guards at the house would hear it too.”  She should have thought of the silhouette herself, but for whatever reason, the Machine in her earpiece was being very quiet on the subject of Claudio and Hero.

            They stood and watched the procession in silence for a few moments longer.

            “You shouldn’t love him.”  Root finally bit out. 

            Jillian didn’t say anything.

             “There are lots of men in the world.  Better men.  Even Benedick…”

            “I don’t want them.  Benedick least of… well, not _quite_ least of all, but he wouldn’t… none of them would be Claudio.”

            “That’s the point.  He’s not worth you.”

            Jillian just shook her head.  “That doesn’t have anything to do with it.”

“It should.”  Root’s eyes flashed.  “The things I’ve seen people do, for _love._ ”  There was raw bitterness in her voice.  “It makes them stupid, irrational, cruel…  They explain away everything, put up with anything, listen to nothing anyone says, because they don’t WANT to believe that their ‘special person’ is a monster who would snatch little girls off the street and bury their bodies under…”

            She bit off the rest of what she was about to say.  Jillian looked at her, eyes wide, but said nothing.  It was an unspoken rule in the agency not to ask too closely about the hacker’s past.  Skye had tried once, and her computer had been immediately fried.  Coulson, apparently, had gleaned some details, but had simply told the others, “There’s a reason she’s the way she is.”  Jillian knew only that it was a subject of deep pain for the woman who had been Samantha Groves.

            So Jillian just stepped forward and placed a hand on Root’s arm.

            A sigh, and the hacker slumped.  “It’s bad code.”  She muttered, more tired than angry.

            Jillian just rubbed Root’s arm up and down. 

            “Tell me.”  Root said, looking at the younger girl.  “Tell me that you’re not JUST doing this because you love him.  Tell me at least that you’ve got your eyes wide open.”

            “I do.”  Jillian answered immediately, clearly.  “I love Claudio, but he was stupid, and didn’t trust me.  The first thing we’re going to do is have a long talk about that.  A long, loud talk.  And if he ever does anything like it again…”  She shook her head.

            Root relaxed a little. 

            “But I know Claudio, and I trust him.”  Jillian continued.  “And so does Coulson, or you know he never would have agreed to this.”

            Root just grunted.

            “We all make mistakes, Sammie.”  Jillian said, slipping into her pet name for the woman.  “Sometimes things get messy.  I thought I was going to have a beautiful perfect wedding, but… love’s not perfect.  Always.”

            “No, but it should be more.”  Root growled.

            “I think it’s better this way, actually.”  Jillian looked down at where Claudio had collapsed, weeping, before the shrine.  “I mean… I knew Claudio wasn’t perfect, but I still had… I don’t know.  This idealized image of him in my mind.  But after the wedding, after… this.”  She nodded in the general direction of the procession.  “I think… I have a better feeling of the _real_ Claudio.”

            “And you still love him.”

            “Yes, Sam, I do.”  Jillian said, a little exasperated.  “He sees the real me, and now I see the real him.  Have you ever had that?  Someone, who you can let down your armor around, just be yourself—even yourself at your lowest, worst moment—and they’ll help you?”

            Root did not answer.  But if Jillian would have turned, she would have seen a thoughtful look in the older woman’s eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I'll stop it here. I could go a little longer, but this gives you an idea. I had a bugger of a time with this last conversation though... trying to meld Jillian's view of love with Root's, both as who she was as Sam Groves, who she is in the context of this story (Beatrice), and who she will be in the context of Person of Interest.
> 
> Not sure if I pulled it off. But in any case, this is a good stopping point for what was really meant to be just an interlude. And actually, there's a lot of fun stuff going on behind the scenes here that's only going to really come out in the next installment of Recruitment Drive: 
> 
> Action Figures! The one that brings everything together! Stay tuned.

**Author's Note:**

> This is an A03 exclusive--I never wrote this on FF.net, because I assumed no one would know it. Probably no one here will either. It was always something in my head, though--at least in the background, and I'm very excited to see how it's received here.
> 
> Incidentally, there's a secret fandom that will eventually be included here too, besides all the ones Koenig and Skye mention in the intro. Kudos to whoever spots it first!


End file.
